Low Tank

I have struggled to write a blog post recently because my tank is low. When I am feeling down, we say around here that I have a “low tank.” My mother came up with the phrase to describe what is going on with me when I’m a little withdrawn, extra tired, and feeling unmotivated. Saying my tank is low seems more accurate than simply saying I am down or in a bad mood A low tank interrupts everything that is important to me. And when my tank is low, I just need to remember the steps I can take to fill it. First, I have learned that is ok to acknowledge that I am struggling. This is often the hardest part, but being self aware and accepting is really important.

Next, I try to identify why my tank is low. Sometimes it’s low for a short period of time, like after a tiring day at school, when I’ve been “on” for too long, or or when I haven’t gotten enough sleep. Then, I just need some quiet time, time without being social and time to just be myself. I see friends in smaller groups, play with my dog, and I snuggle my siblings.

Often, stress causes me to have a low tank. First quarter senior year with college applications make it hard to keep my tank full. I took this weekend to do many of the things that make me happy. I saw my camp friends, cleaned my room, and took a few naps. This might sound like an unproductive weekend to some, but this was truly the best self care I could do.

I used to get upset when my parents called me lazy for sleeping in, or called me unmotivated for not getting all my homework done. Eventually, I communicated to them that I am doing more for myself on the inside, even if it may not appear to be as productive on the outside. It is not laziness so much as it is me resting my too-busy brain. Sometimes I just need to push my homework aside. Refilling my tank comes first.

Like my blog post about braiding bracelets, you should try to develop skills that can help fill you up and also avoid things that do not help (like social media!). I recommend writing out a list of things that work for you. Maybe you can keep them in your notes on your phone, and then later in the week when you might need a bit of a refill, review your list. I’ll start you off:

• Acknowledge your struggle

• Walk with your dog

• Refold your clothes

• Make your bed

• Blow dry your hair

• Get coffee with a friend

• Go on a drive and listen to your favorite music

• Hug someone

• Journal

• Go to sleep early

Acknowledging the struggle is always a key first step to filling your tank. I just took my own advice. In writing this blog post, I am acknowledging my challenges and filling my tank as I write.